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FWA Q&A: Oliver Kay

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Oliver Kay of the Times on a garlic bread factory, a nightmare in Naples and a load of rubbish in Braga…

Your first ever newspaper?
The first to employ me full-time was the Nottingham Evening Post, which I joined as a trainee sports reporter, but I’d done a lot of work experience before that, starting on the Crewe/Nantwich Chronicle and then spending several months on the Evening Sentinel in Stoke. I learned a lot at the Sentinel, including that one of the few ways to stop the press – literally – is to put a foil-wrapped pasty in a microwave so that it catches fire, setting off the alarms and automatically bringing the fire engines round. “Who is responsible for this?” “The work experience kid on sport.”

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
I worked in a pub while trying to break into journalism, but my best answer to this has to be working in a garlic bread factory one summer. Twelve-hour shifts in a garlic bread factory. I was absolutely useless. I would slow the whole conveyor belt down. I was to Primebake what Dimitar Berbatov is to Manchester United – but without the good bits. I didn’t last long.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
My playing career peaked when I scored a hat-trick aged in my one of my first matches for primary school, aged eight. I was or am genuinely two-footed and can hit a decent pass, but essentially I’m lazy, slow and my mind wanders, so there was no danger of becoming a footballer. I’m so out of practice now that, on the rare occasions my back will withstand a kickaround, I’m an embarrassment.

Most memorable match covered?
A few stand out for different reasons. For unpredictability combined with high quality Manchester United v Real Madrid in 2003. For best performance by one team then possibly Argentina v Serbia & Montenegro in the 2006 World Cup and the Cambiasso goal. For atmosphere, Liverpool v Chelsea Champions League semi-final second leg in 2005. I don’t think my ears have been the same since.

Best stadium?
You can’t beat a ground with atmosphere and soul. The ones that come to mind are Villa Park, Anfield, Goodison, Old Trafford, Celtic Park, Ibrox, all of which are fantastic when — and I must stress this — they’re at their best. Of the great European grounds, Camp Nou and the Bernabeu are great, but the atmosphere often feels a little sedate. I love San Siro. At least when it’s full, there’s a fervour there that you don’t get in Spain. Shame about the wifi.

…and the worst?
When I went to Braga in Euro 2004, I looked around the ground, which is built into a rockface, and I thought “Wow.” Before too long I’d changed my mind to “Actually, this is just rubbish.”

Your best ever scoop?
I’ll follow what Neil Ashton said. My best scoop is my next one (although you’ll probably have longer to wait for mine than Ash’s.)

Your personal new-tech disaster?
Napoli v Manchester City a few months ago was one of the worst. My laptop failed all night. I couldn’t get on the internet through the wifi or my dongle. I’m always happy to do it the old-fashioned way, talking to a copytaker, but I couldn’t get a phone line out either. It was a stressful night, which might be why, having got to Naples airport afterwards, I left my phone on the bus. Nice work.

Biggest mistake?
Trusting the word of people when instinct tells you they’re chancers and liars. You learn from things like that.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
I used to look a lot like Muzzy Izzet when he was at Leicester and I was slimmer. But in terms of actually being mistaken, a lot of people on Twitter mistake me for Ollie Holt — mostly when they’re angry. There was another occasion when I was driving to a match when I heard on the radio “We’re joined now by Oliver Kay from The Times.” Ever professional, Ollie somehow continued without putting right that slur on his character.

Most media friendly manager?
There are the obvious ones like Harry Redknapp, Neil Warnock and Sam Allardyce who are always available and always willing. It does surprise me slightly that there is such a public backlash against those who are willing to communicate rather than those who don’t. The majority are accommodating both publicly and privately. One I really like is Roberto Martinez.

Best ever player?
The best of my lifetime are Maradona and Messi. I loved Maradona even when we were all supposed to hate him in 1986. I never had chance to watch Maradona play live, but watching Messi is a huge privilege. He’s a genius.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
This Barcelona team are the best club side I’ve witnessed. To dominate Europe in the Champions League era is incredible, never mind to do so in the style they have. Some of their antics can be off-putting, but they only seem to resort that in matches against Real Madrid. International? As well as Spain, I’ve had soft spots for France of 1984, Holland of 1988, West Germany of 1990 and France of 2000, but the Brazil team of 1982 – Zico, Socrates, Junior, Eder, Falcao – was the one that opened my eyes to the world beyond my League Ladders.

Best pre-match grub?
Arsenal and Chelsea are good – Chelsea let themselves down with plastic plates and cutlery – but the carvery at Manchester City is the best. It’s best not to eat for a couple of days beforehand if going to City.

Best meal had on your travels?
Why have we moved on to food? The best meal on a work trip was probably at the River Café in Brooklyn. Fantastic food, but probably above all because I’d flown my wife out to join me in New York at the end of a pre-season trip. If I’d gone there with a group of journalists, we would only have ended up talking shop.

…and the worst?
I’ll try anything that’s different – from bear sausages in Warsaw to whale steaks in Oslo. One thing I’ll never try again is the range of delicacies I sampled from a street hawker in Beijing on a pre-season tour: a few beetles, a scorpion and a silkworm. The beetles and the scorpion were tolerable, but the silkworm was stomach-churning. I paid for it for about a week afterwards … .

Best hotel stayed in?
I’m less fussed about home comforts than about location. Put me in a hotel near Las Ramblas or Broadway or Ipanema and I’ll be happy as long as the bed is comfortable.

…and the worst?
Is there a bad hotel in Monaco? Yes. And our travel company managed to find it. I’m not one to complain about this kind of thing, but it’s tough being on a business trip in a hotel room that doesn’t have a plug socket. I also spent a fortnight of the 2006 World Cup in a grim place on an industrial park in Dortmund, where the seat of the desk chair as high as the desk. Again, not great working conditions.

Favourite football writer?
There are some brilliant ones in this country. I would happily reel off dozens who I admire. If pushed for one, I’d say my ex-colleague Martin Samuel. Sometimes I disagree violently with his columns – a few times recently, in fact – but I always enjoy them. For a columnist to entertain, provoke AND inform takes some doing and in my opinion Martin is the best at it.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
I always liked Barry Davies, even if there was always the suspicion that he’d rather be commentating on the pommel horse, Wimbledon or the Trooping of the Colour. TV-wise these days, I’d say Martin Tyler or Clive Tyldesley – Tyler’s reaction to Sunderland’s stoppage-time winner the other week really caught the moment – but I always enjoy radio commentaries more. If you listen to a match on 5 Live, you know you’re going to get a really good commentary. (Or at least you’re more likely to take their word for it … .)

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Just one? It’s a poor state of affairs that we don’t have post-match and even pre-match mixed zones, where reporters have the opportunity to speak to players as they pass. But we’re a million miles from that when Manchester United don’t even hold a post-match press conference. That is a ridiculous situation, which neither the Premier League nor we as a football-writing community should have allowed to take hold. And do print that.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
Outside football? Pah. I would have loved to be at the Rugby World Cup final in 2003 or to have been ringside at one of the all-time great fights, but I’ve always been about football. What am I looking forward to most at the Olympics? The football.

Last book read?
Currently reading “Freedom” by Jonathan Franzen. The last sport book I read was Ronny Reng’s “A Life Too Short”, about Robert Enke, which is a stunning, brilliantly researched and extremely important work. I can’t recommend it highly enough.

Favourite current TV programme?
Not sure you’d class either as current, but I’ve just been catching up with the latest series of Curb Your Enthusiasm and The Thick Of It, both of which are brilliant.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
I’ve got programmes and ticket stubs going back way before I was born, but I’ve not really gone out of my way to get things signed. There are plenty of things I treasure – programmes, shirts, old photos – but no particular stand-out item.

FWA Q&A: Neil Ashton

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The Daily Mail’s Neil Ashton on clapping Palace fans, Iniesta’s goal and a whopper in Buenos Aires…

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
Yes, I worked in my mother’s restaurant when I was about 16/17. I loved it, particularly as I set out in each shift to earn more in tips than I did in salary (which wasn’t difficult on my mother’s rates). I also worked for a corporate events company in golf, which allowed me to travel around the world and in return I rarely got paid. It didn’t last long, much as I enjoyed it.

Finest achievement playing football?
When Steve Coppell turned to me and said: “You’re on” in Geoff Thomas’s benefit game at the Colosseum between Palace and Manchester United in 2006. To play in the same team as my boyhood heroes – Geoff, Mark Bright, Ian Wright and Andy Gray and to play centre-half against Mark Hughes – was something I didn’t imagine could ever happen. Shaun Custis from the Sun was on the phone the next day and he said: “Right, you’ve got two minutes to tell me everything and then I never want to hear another word about it again.” Somehow I forgot to tell him I had clapped the Palace supporters in the Holmesdale Road when I walked off the pitch – unfortunately for me it has now become part of Matt Lawton’s entertaining dinner party stories.

Most memorable match covered?
On the rare occasion when I need to remind myself of the reasons why I love the game, I think of the unique roar that went up from a corner of Barcelona fans when Andres Iniesta scored that remarkable stoppage time equaliser at Stamford Bridge in the Champions League semi-final second leg in 2009. I’ve never heard a sound like it and I was transfixed by the celebrations that
followed by the corner flag.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Professionally it has to be Iniesta’s goal against Chelsea – the moment it left his boot, it was destined to beat Petr Cech. Personally it’s John Motson’s commentary of Mark Bright’s hooked, left foot equaliser against Liverpool in the 1990 FA Cup semi-final at Villa Park. On the Holte End we momentarily stood in shock each time Palace scored and it was only a second or so later when we realised the linesman’s flag hadn’t gone up, it was bedlam.

Best stadium?
The Millennium Stadium in Cardiff is magnificent. For historical significance, then it’s tough to beat Camp Nou or the Bernabeu.

…and the worst?
None. I still get a knot in my stomach on matchday, a real sense of anticipation and it doesn’t matter which game I’m going to. I got the same feeling in the days when I covered Crewe v Port Vale as I do for the Champions League final – to the supporters it means just as much.

Your best ever scoop?
I’m not one for patting myself on the back. I prefer to look ahead and would like to think that my best stories are still ahead of me.

Biggest mistake?
This question brings me out in a cold sweat. I once got an introduction to a property developer who wanted to buy Elland Road at the height of their financial troubles. The developer wanted to pull down the stadium – Billy Bremner statue and all – and suggested that the mighty Leeds went to groundshare with Barnsley while they redeveloped the site for a supermarket. It didn’t go down well with Leeds fans.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
No, although I’ve been told AVB looks like me.

Favourite football writer?
I would love to be able to write with the touch or poise of Hayward, but it’s never going to happen. In terms of emerging talent, Sami Mokbel at the Daily Mail has the fearless qualities that are required of news reporters. Good on him.

Favourite TV commentator?
Has to be Bryon Butler, painting a picture and mesmerising the radio audience with that incredible change of pace. His description of Maradona’s second goal at the 1986 World Cup – Maradona, turns like a little eel, he comes away from trouble, little squab man, comes inside Butcher and leaves him for dead, outside Fenwick and leaves him for dead, and puts the ball away…and that is why
Maradona is the greatest player in the world…’ is broadcasting at the highest level.

Most media friendly manager?
Harry. Doesn’t everyone say this?

Best ever player?
Zizou. I still marvel at his ability, La Roulette trick that took two or three players out of the game in one spin of those magical boots. The guy was something else.

Best ever teams (club and international)
CLUB: Current Barcelona team, although Ajax’s 1995 Champions League winning team would give them a game. INTERNATIONAL: Spain in 2008 and 2010. The football’s breathtaking at times.

Best pre-match grub?
Wembley, provided it’s an FA event. They really know how to look after the media.

Best meal had on your travels?
Carlos Tevez’s two best friends in Argentina took me into Fuerte Apache and in return I told them to book the best restaurant in Buenos Aires – they got the driver to take us Burger King and they dined out with whoppers, fries and genetically-modified Sprites. Respect

…and the worst?
Any time I have to eat food on the run or from an airport.

Best hotel stayed in?
The Faena in Buenos Aires. England’s general manager Franco Baldini could have a nice sideline business in hotel recommendations around the world.

…and the worst?
When I put my bags down in my room at the Cabanas in Sun City for the World Cup in South Africa, I wondered how I would ever get through the next 42 days and nights. The only thing that spared me was the company of the Independent’s Sam Wallace and the Sunday Telegraph’s “foot corr” as he calls himself, Duncan White.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
I wouldn’t really, they do a solid job in tough circumstances. Perhaps I’d probably remind them that they are employees of the club and are not part of the management or squad. I’ve seen press officers walk on to the pitch to high five players and pat them on the bum at the end of a game and I’ve seen players kissed on both cheeks by female press officers when they come out of the dressing rooms. It’s unnecessary, but can understand why it happens when people are caught up in the moment.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
Has to be the US Open at Flushing Meadows.

Favourite current TV programme?
What is this, Shoot! magazine? I flick through the channels and find some football. If there’s nothing live, then it’s Football Greatest Managers on Sky, or FA Cup Legends on ESPN.

Last book read?
I’ve been reading A Life Too Short, the tragic story of the German goalkeeper Robert Enke, since the start of November, but the poor guy had so many demons I can only read it in short passages.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
I paid an absolute fortune for Crystal Palace’s famous adidas sash kit from the 1980/81 season worn by the No7 at the time David Giles – it’s an absolute beaut and I wouldn’t sell it for a million pounds. Mark Bright’s No9 shirt from the 0-9 defeat at Anfield in September 1989 and Ian Wright’s No10 shirt from 1987/88 are also up there. I collect match-worn Crystal Palace shirts and have told the chairman Steve Parish he can put the entire collection on display in the grand entrance hall to their new stadium when they finally move there.
ENDS

FWA Q&A: Alex Montgomery

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ALEX MONTGOMERY on ladies panties, what really makes an exclusive, dark days in the Sun and a snake in South Korea

Your first ever newspaper?
The Sunday Post. My work was split between the Post and Weekly News. It was a great training ground made greater by one exceptional journalist, John Dron, then sports editor of the Post. Any career I have had would not have seen the light of day without his mentoring. John died recently and my regret is not being able to attend his funeral.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
My schooling was a disaster which ended with me being shown the door as a 15-year-old. I have more in common with Kelvin MacKenzie than he would suspect; the count is one O-level apiece. My first job was in a Glasgow shipping office. From there I moved to a clothing manufacturer in the east end of Glasgow. The speciality was producing ladies panties so I became a panty makers assistant on £5 a week. I had to stand on a platform doing nothing more technical than cutting material in front of a group of local ladies on sewing machines. I lasted six weeks but still carry the scars. From there I made up for lost learning time, then into journalism.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
There was no fine achievement. I was next to useless. My centre of gravity, my backside, was too far from the ground. That’s my excuse.

Most memorable match covered?
It was series of matches involving Brazil, Argentina and Italy in Barcelona during the World Cup Finals of 1982. Other matches which live long in the memory: England’s European Championship 4-1 victory in Belgrade against Yugoslavia (Nov 1987). It was special because it was so comprehensive when we had gathered to record the end of Bobby Robson as national manager; England’s brilliant performance in beating Holland 4-1 at Wembley in the 1996 European Championship, another uplifting result. I have never been able to understand why it was dismissed by many of my colleagues as a victory gifted to Terry Venables’s England simply because the Dutch were rowing amongst themselves. Aren’t they always?

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Marco van Basten’s truly amazing volleyed strike from what looked an impossible angle in Holland’s European Championship Final win against the USSR in Munich 1988.

Best stadium?
For me it was Ibrox in the Fifties and Sixties when they packed them in and the atmosphere for big European nights was breathtaking.

…and the worst?
The one where you never have a phone line that works. Benfica’s Estadio da Luz in the old days before mobile phones and dongles was hit and miss for calls. You would pick up a phone, hear nothing, dial your London number, hear nothing, wait, ask for copy, hear nothing, wait, read or ad lib your match report, slowly, finish, say goodbye and hope someone was on the other end. There were occasions when it worked, miraculously.

Your best ever scoop?
So-called exclusive stories are satisfying. Specialist writer/reporters are expected to produce them but if you come up with three in a year it will be three more than most. And even when you find one it is not unknown for desks to hide them, presumably because they do not believe the info. One such was my Gazza for Lazio tip off. The Sun sports desk managed to turn that into Gazza turning down an offer to play for another Serie A club. I then wrote that Gazza’s people had a meeting at Heathrow with Lazio’s representatives. That was thrown away inside. The story was eventually confirmed officially – after Gazza’s then agents had lawyers write to my desk claiming it was untrue — and it was only then the desk asked me to write it as a back page lead. Exclusives drop out of the sky from time to time so you just enjoy them when your hard work makes you lucky.

Your personal new-tech disaster?
I was sent to the Mexico World Cup finals in 1986 with one of Fleet Street’s first Tandy copy-sending machines. I wasn’t taught how to work it and it came without instructions. I first used it as a word processor for a 60 paragraph pre-World Cup piece from Colorado Springs where Bobby Robson had set up England’s pre-WC camp. I was about to file by the usual method of reading it over to a copy taker in London when the American AT and T operator who was dealing with my call heard me mention the name Tandy. When I informed her that I could not work the machine she suggested I asked their specialist Tandy operator for help. The process of transmitting through muffs attached to the phone piece was explained to me. Lesson over, she was going to contact London and get back with a direct line. I was to be ready. Simple. The call came through, I did what I was told, my screen went blank and the copy was lost for ever. It was a great loss only to me. I had to write it again. A nightmare.

Biggest mistake?
We all make them but I cannot think of one that changed my life. I worked with a couple of nasty individuals near the end of my days on the Sun and I should have dealt with them better than I did. I gave them far too much respect. I should have met up with them in a place without recording devices and CCTV cameras, and convinced them of the consequences should they continue with their negative approach. Something along these lines.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
No.

Most media friendly manager?
The ones who talk to you. There are lots of good ones out there so it is a question of getting to know them. You have your favourites who can be reached at any time. They become friends, perhaps great friends. There are others you can nod to and who’ll nod back. And a few, the untrustworthy ones, who will say I am the one not to be trusted.

Best ever player?
Alfredo di Stefano. He mesmerised me with his elegance for Real Madrid in the 1960 European Cup Final against Eintracht Frankfurt. I stood with my dad on the huge Hampden terraces and like so many that memorable night I believed we had come to support the Germans who had destroyed Rangers in the semi-final. By the end we stood applauding Real. I am not sure the best-ever tag applies even to Alfredo. One of the best for sure but I have been so fortunate to have watched the greats on their good and bad days: Pele, Maradona, Garrincha, Best, Greaves, Law, Baxter, Henderson, Johnstone, Moore, Charlton, Beckenbauer, Platini. Zidane, Cruyff plus Messi and Ronaldo of the current era. All on their day unbeatable.

Best ever teams (club and international)
Real Madrid 1960. If only it was possible see them face Guardiola’s Barcelona team. My money would be on Real. International: Brazil of 1970.

Best pre-match grub?
Arsenal are highly rated by my colleagues.

Best meal had on your travels?
It was a one off when Ipswich met Saint-Etienne in what was the Uefa Cup in 1981. The press plus Ipswich directors and officials were invited to pre-match lunch at the stadium. This was a tradition of the French club. The menu had six courses produced by a chef from each of six regions. The Ipswich chairman John Cobbold was so impressed he decided something would be done for the return. The hospitality at Portman Road was magnificent even by Cobbold’s extravagant standards. Ipswich won the quarter final with a 7-2 aggregate against the soon to be crowned French champions led by Michel Platini

…and the worst?
A meal in Beijing where no-one in the restaurant spoke English and we did not have a word of Mandarin. We ordered what we thought was a selection of dishes which included a hand motion to represent fish but turned out to be misunderstood as snake.

Best hotel stayed in?
Goodwood Park Hotel, Singapore. Five star plus and where the coffee costs more than the brandy.

…and the worst?
A scary hotel somewhere in South Korea. There was a steel door opening in one of the walls in my room which was padlocked. I imagined it as a fridge in the morgue where they store the bodies.

Favourite football writer?
In my Glasgow youth Malcolm Munro made his copy so interesting. I never worked with him but it was a privilege to be on the same tours laterally as Taylor, Sanderson, Rodger, Herron and others who knew the job inside out. The men still working can look out for themselves.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
Kenneth Wolstenholme.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Reduce the money Sky TV pays out to the game. It would mean less money for the players which hopefully would bring their excesses under some control, make them more pleasant to deal with.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
It would be a dream to watch live three Olympic finals – the 800 metres, 1500 metres and 5000 metres. Any of the track finals would do but these three would be my preferred events.

Last book read?
Freddy Mercury by Lesley-Ann Jones; Truman Capote’s In Cold Blood and Andre Agassi’s autobiography.

Favourite current TV programme?
Anything on any sport.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
I have two unused tickets for the last FA Cup Final at the old Wembley and two unused tickets for England’s last international at the old Wembley.

Alex Montgomery has been a member of the FWA for 42 years. He has covered finals of 10 World Cups. Has worked for Hayters Sports Agency, the Daily Mail, the Sun, Today, the News of the World and the Mail on Sunday (freelance).

My Week: Andrew Warshaw

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ANDREW WARSHAW on Arsenal playing second fiddle to University Challenge, a frozen shoulder and Guys and Dolls

SUNDAY JANUARY 8
You know Christmas is well and truly over when the decorations are taken down but at least there is a new dog-training class for our lovable mutt Maisie who, for once, does not disgrace herself. First task of the day is buying the Mail on Sunday to check whether my Arsenal preview has got in. It has, always a warm feeling for a freelancer. Intend spending most of today resting up after driving to Norwich and back 24 hours ago having been sent to interview the parents of Oldham’s on-loan defender Tom Adeyemi following the infamous verbal abuse case at Anfield. Well, interview in theory. Unfortunately there was no-one at the inn but a peep over the fence revealed a makeshift goal and half a dozen balls. The right house then. Three hours’ doorstepping failed to result in anyone returning home so it was time for a spot of lateral thinking. Ended up writing a colour piece after a friendly neighbour painted a warm-hearted picture of the Adeyemi family – and invited me in out of the cold for several cups of coffee! This particular Sunday afternoon means only one thing for this particular FA Cup-worshipping, Spurs-supporting traditionalist: the Fourth Round draw. My stomach churns as the balls are plucked out. Phew, Watford away. Let’s not get carried away but an obviously winnable tie. Before that, watch Man City so nearly snatch a dramatic draw with 10 men against Man Utd thanks to an inspired piece of tactical nous from Mancini. Tonight I’m going to the Old Bull for my music website nlbeat.com (couldn’t resist a plug), only just set up and sadly not revenue-earning but a fun hobby. The pub, which has been turned into a veritable galaxy of memorabilia, has vinyl LPs and singles attached to every wall and concert ticket stubs, featuring all the great acts and donated by music fans, covering every inch of every bar table stretching back to the early 1960s.

MONDAY JANUARY 9
The editor of FC Business, one of my magazine clients, informs me that my piece on Portsmouth’s financial mismanagement has ruffled more than a few feathers. Well let’s face it, I am still a small creditor waiting to be paid. Most of today is taken up working on stories for Insideworldfootball.biz for which I have the grand title of Chief Football Reporter. The editor of FC Business is still speaking to me by the afternoon, thank goodness, and commissions a piece on goal-line technology, with the big decision due to made at the beginning of March. Tried my hardest to avoid Arsenal-Leeds on the box but even I have to marvel at Thierry Henry’s match winner. Only after watching University Challenge and Above Suspicion, however.

TUESDAY JANUARY 10
My role at Insideworldfootball.biz also means doubling up at times for our main site Insidethegames.biz so it’s off to Wembley to cover a press conference about the Olympic torch. While there manage to get two exclusives for the site with BOA chairman Colin Moynihan. This evening I’m joining my son at Underhill to support our second team, Barnet, in the Johnstone’s Paint trophy southern section semi-final first leg. Paolo di Canio’s Swindon are massive favourites after their exploits against Wigan but Barnet score a second-half equaliser to at least keep the tie alive with Wembley the prize. Well worth the 10 quid entrance fee.

WEDNESDAY JANUARY 11
Ring a few clients touting for business and check with the editor of Fifa Magazine to see when my piece on Qatar will be published. Told by the Mail on Sunday that I’ll be second man at Spurs versus Wolves on Saturday alongside Patrick Collins. Always a privilege. Couldn’t ask for a better game to report on. Speaking of Spurs, here it comes, our game in hand. It’s off to White Hart Lane, again with my son, to roar on the boys. It’s only four overground stops but the recorded information on the train hasn’t been amended and wrongly informs us we are going in the other direction and heading back the way we came. Everyone breaks into laughter. Good old Network Rail. After meeting friends for a hasty kebab a 20-minute walk from the ground, I pick up the tickets with moments to spare. Everton are typically disciplined and organised – I have enormous respect for David Moyes given the resources at his disposal – but as so often they lack penetration. The score remains at 1-0 until Benny’s thunderbolt makes sure of the points. What a night.

THURSDAY JANUARY 12
Slept appallingly maybe because of all the excitement at Spurs or maybe because my frozen shoulder starts playing up again. It’s becoming a right pain, literally and metaphorically. No golf for the past two months. Time to start forward-planning for the Euro 2012 finals in Poland and Ukraine but will I go? Haven’t missed a major finals since the early 1980s but this could be the first. The Olympics will be 24/7 and I’m not getting any younger. Nothing for talkSPORT this week. Normally I’m on at least once as their football politics man but no calls so far. Still, today’s highlight is meeting Jordan’s Prince Ali bin Al Hussein, the newest kid on the block among the Fifa hierarchy who has invited me for a one-on-one during a private trip to London. He gives me a couple of decent lines for Insideworldfootball and another which I’m asked not to use for a few weeks. Being a theatre buff, tonight I’m off to see Guys and Dolls at the Gatehouse in Highgate, north London. It’s probably the best production I’ve ever seen of one of THE great musicals. If only I had been discovered during my long amateur dramatics career.

FRIDAY JANUARY 13
What scary moments will Friday 13th throw up? Luckily none to speak though my weekly column for my newspaper client in Doha is 24 hours late so I’d better get a move on. Just manage to get it written after walking Maisie before it’s off to Arsenal for Arsene Wenger’s lunch time press conference ahead of the game against Swansea. I’m there for the Sundays and first hear Wenger tell the dailies he is fed up always being asked about Spurs. I have to bite my lip. Finish the day quite late before I realise another week has flown past without having worked on my book. Next week it HAS to take priority.

SATURDAY JANUARY 14
Spend much of the morning preparing for Spurs-Wolves. Always try to take as much written research as I can to games. You never know. Make sure the dongle is working just in case the internet doesn’t. Given a car park pas by my neighbour who is a season ticket holder. Train is more comfortable and slightly quicker but I take advantage of the offer since by the time I need to leave there are only two trains an hour to get home. Another end to a varied week. How much have I earned? Can’t think about that yet…there’s Match of the Day to watch.

FWA Q&A: Sam Pilger

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SAM PILGER on scoring at Old Trafford, being mistaken for Ryan Giggs and causing Sir Alex Ferguson to give Roy Keane the hair-dryer treatment…

Your first ever newspaper?
Not a newspaper, but the Manchester United magazine, which, when I joined in 1996, was the country’s biggest selling sports magazine. This was a time before Sky Sports News, MUTV or even the club having a proper website, so it was the main source of news. It was a great grounding to regularly interview Sir Alex Ferguson, David Beckham and Roy Keane in a time when there wasn’t any interference from agents or press officers.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
Not really, other than a couple of summers spent hiding in the warehouse at Marks and Spencer. Both my parents were Fleet Street journalists, so it’s in the blood.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
Scoring at Old Trafford at the Stretford End in a journalists game. I almost cried. And winning the South London 7-a-side League title in 1996 and 2003.

Most memorable match covered?
I can’t imagine anything will ever surpass the 1999 FA Cup semi-final replay. The match had been dramatic enough with David Beckham’s brilliant goal, Dennis Bergkamp’s equaliser, Roy Keane’s sending-off and Peter Schmeichel’s last minute penalty save before Ryan Giggs beat the whole Arsenal defence to win the match. An incredible night.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
That Giggs winner at Villa Park.

Best stadium?
The Maracana even though it had clearly seen better days.

…and the worst?
The sterile Stade Louis II in Monaco.

Your best ever scoop?
My interview with Roy Keane for FourFourTwo in 2001 when he revealed his frustrations with United. The Daily Mirror lifted it and splashed it across their back page as ‘The Most Explosive Interview of the Year.’ I was told Ferguson hauled him in to his office on the back of it.

Your personal new-tech disaster?
More old-tech really, as that damn ‘Voice Activated’ button on the Dictaphone has butchered interviews with Teddy Sheringham and Bryan Robson.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
As ridiculous as it sounds, I took part in a penalty shoot-out challenge against Peter Shilton on Hackney Marshes several years ago, and I overheard someone say, ‘Is that Ryan Giggs?’ As I said, ridiculous. More realistically, someone once asked if I was the former Leicester and Spurs American goalkeeper Kasey Keller.

Most media friendly manager?
Steve Bruce

Best ever player?
Zinedine Zidane

Best ever teams (club and international)?
The current Barcelona side and the France side of 2000.

Best pre-match grub?
During their spell in the Premier League Ipswich Town did a memorable spread at Portman Road.

Best meal had on your travels?
A fish restaurant just outside Jerez in southern Spain while covering the 2000 Blind World Cup. (Brazil won, England went out in the quarter-finals.)

…and the worst?
A lard-smothered bap outside Hillsborough.

Best hotel stayed in?
The Rio Othon Palace in Rio de Janiero where the roof-top pool gave sweeping views of Copacabana Beach and Sugar Loaf Mountain as I watched Romario doing his laps.

…and the worst?
The Dolby in Salford. It had a security fence around it.

Favourite football writer?
It is difficult to separate Paul Hayward, Oliver Holt and Patrick Collins.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
I still get goose bumps when I hear Peter Jones, he had such a wonderfully evocative voice. Keeping it old school for TV as well, I would say Barry Davies and Brian Moore.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Throw open the dressing rooms after matches. It would require an enormous and unprecedented culture change, but if the NFL and NBA can do it why can’t the Premier League? I won’t be holding my breath.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
I have been lucky enough to go to a Super Bowl, Wimbledon men’s final, a 100m Olympic final, and most Ashes series, so I would go for a deciding Game 7 in the NBA finals.

Last book read?
The End of the Party by Andrew Rawnsley

Favourite current TV programme?
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

Your most prized football memorabilia?
A number 10 Argentina shirt signed by Diego Maradona to my son Louis. He’d better appreciate it when he’s older.

Manchester United’s Best XI by Sam Pilger is available now on the Amazon Kindle store.

FWA Q&A: Laura Williamson

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Laura Williamson on travelling with Hawk-Eye…dismal haircuts…Jennifer Aniston…and super Grimsby

Your first ever newspaper?
The Hull Daily Mail, as part of the Daily Mail’s graduate reporter programme. I worked in news: the court reporting I enjoyed, the council meetings less so. And as for the dreaded ‘door knocks’ – the memories still bring a shudder.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
I used to work for Hawk-Eye, the company responsible for the ball-tracking technology used in cricket and tennis. I travelled around the world setting up and running the equipment for use in live television broadcasts or official reviews. India was the most taxing place to work, the Cricket World Cup in the West Indies was the highlight and the Australian Open tennis was just exhausting. And Sir Ian Botham’s colour blindness is a slight problem when you’re trying to get him to talk about red, blue, yellow and white balls on a pitch map.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
As my Dad always says, I am a bit of a ‘headless chicken’ when it comes to playing football. Plenty of enthusiasm, pretty quick and reasonably fit, but no discipline, technical ability or finesse whatsoever. Filling in for my sister’s team (she played to county standard) was about the limit of my achievements as a footballer.

Most memorable match covered?
Fulham 4 Juventus 1.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Kevin Donovan’s goal for Grimsby Town against Northampton Town at Wembley in 1998, which took the Mariners back up to the old Division One. I had a dismal haircut and my face painted in black and white stripes, but they were certainly good times.

Best stadium?
The Bernabeu.

…and the worst?
The San Siro if you’ve got to file anything.

Your best ever scoop?
It’s not really a scoop, but breaking the awful news about Jack Collison’s dad losing his life in a motorbike accident on the way to a West Ham game was my first exclusive when I joined the Mail, so it’s one I remember.

Your personal new-tech disaster?
*Touch wood* I’ve been OK so far. There were some pretty hairy moments at Hawk-Eye, though.

Biggest mistake?
Turning someone over when it wasn’t worth it. It’s a difficult judgement to make sometimes, but I got it wrong.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
A drunk (and obviously visually impaired) Cheltenham fan said I looked like Jennifer Aniston at the weekend (although why she would be waiting for a bus outside White Hart Lane I don’t know). But it’s usually anyone with a gap in their teeth.

Most media friendly manager?
Harry Redknapp.

Best ever player?
Steven Gerrard.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
Grimsby Town 1997-98. Spain at the moment take some beating.

Best pre-match grub?
Arsenal’s always good, but the fry ups at Spurs before early kick-offs do the trick.

Best meal had on your travels?
One in Beverly Hills recently when I went for the MLS Cup final. Amazing food, although I was probably too busy looking at everyone else to fully enjoy it.

…and the worst?
Probably one of the disgusting, dry, mayonnaise-filled, overpriced club sandwiches you’re forced to eat when you get back to a hotel room after a game and you’re starving.

Best hotel stayed in?
Cinnamon Grand, Colombo, Sri Lanka.

…and the worst?
The cell-like room I ended up with in Odense, Denmark – after going on the man from the Sun’s recommendation! Fatal.

Favourite football writer?
Oliver Holt.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
John Murray on BBC Radio 5Live. Martin Tyler on Sky Sports.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Re-introduce proper mixed zones. The way you request a number of players and then end up with the third choice goalkeeper, if anyone at all, just breeds mistrust and frustration.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
A big track final at the Olympics. I can’t wait!

Last book read?
Ian Hawkey – Feet of the Chameleon.

Favourite current TV programme?
Can I have Downton Abbey as it’s only just finished?

Your most prized football memorabilia?
It all goes in my Dad’s collection, but I’ve got a signed Maradona picture on the wall at home – just to wind my boyfriend up.

FWA Q&A: Dennis Signy

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DENNIS SIGNY, a former FWA chairman and Life Member, on reporting a match he hardly saw, how he almost signed Ian Wright for Aston Villa and something fishy at Wycombe.

Your first ever newspaper?
Joined the Hendon and Finchley Times in 1942 as a fire engine-chasing cub reporter at £4 a week. Later returned as editor for 17 years – with Saturdays off for football.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
I was general manager of Brentford in the mid-1960s; then chief executive and a director of QPR in the Eighties. Was PR consultant to the Football League for a decade.

Most memorable match covered?
An amateur international between Holland and England at Zwolle when I moved to Fleet Street to join Hayters. England won 5-2 but I didn’t see any of the goals because I was on the phone to the London Evening News from the secretary’s office behind a goal for all but the first 10 minutes of the game. I had to cover the match for FIVE Sunday papers and TWO Mondays after completing my Evening News runner. Had to go into the crowd behind the goal to get names of England scorers from solicitor Mike Pinner, the Manchester United and QPR goalkeeper. It’s a great after-dinner speech story.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Brentford fans singing “There’s only one Dennis Signy” after we beat Fulham at Craven Cottage in the London Senior Cup Final.

Best stadium?
Anfield, with Liverpool at their peak.

…and the worst?
The Shay, Halifax – but many contenders.

Your best ever scoop?
I got news that Ron Greenwood was to be appointed West Ham United manager at a board meeting in two days time. News came from an insurance man who had met the Hammers’ chairman on the stairs. Daily Mail paid £75 for the exclusive; Reg Hayter refused to let me have a £75 bonus.

Your personal new-tech disaster?
NIL RETURN

Biggest mistake?
Going to work for the late Jim Gregory at QPR after being his Press man (unpaid) for 23 years.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
Yes, Doug Ellis, the former Aston Villa chairman. I was at Highbury one day sitting with George Graham when the man from PA, who had been sitting with Ian Wright, came over and said Ian was wondering what Doug Ellis was doing there. George Graham called him over and said that Mr Ellis wanted to sign him for Villa. We made it last some time – Ian always called me ‘Doug’ after that.

Most media friendly manager?
Got to be Barry Fry. If I had a pound for every name Barry gave me for soccer chat I’d have retired years ago.

Best ever player?
Tom Finney.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
The present Barcelona, Arthur Rowe’s push and run side of the Fifties (possibly better than Bill Nicholson’s Double winning team) and the Hungary side that humbled England 6-3 at Wembley. Puskas – great – di Stefano – magical – Hidegkuti – supreme.

Best pre-match grub?
Fish pie in Wycombe Wanderers’ board room; Cumberland sausages at Luton Town.

Best meal had on your travels?
Can’t remember what we ate but Martin Samuel paying for dinner at Peterborough was memorable.

Favourite football writer?
David Lacey – I went head-to-head with him on my first match for the Times.Glenn Hoddle’s debut for Monaco. Reg Hayter had a hard job convincing me my copy was not rubbish by comparison.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
Brian Moore was the TV master.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Get rid of agents.

Favourite current TV programme?
Have I Got News For You.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
A Lifetime Achievement award from BBC London for my work in football over the decades.

FWA Q&A: Matt Scott

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The Guardian’s Digger and self-confessed Gooner on Sammy, Crossie, Steve McMahon’s finger and being Paolo Rossi in his garden

Your first ever newspaper?
The Daily Star. I was sent there to be Howard Wheatcroft’s Gooner nemesis.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
No: I came straight into it from university.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
You mean apart from only letting two goals in for Burnham Ramblers U-11s in the South-East Essex Cup final in the full-size goals at Chelmsford City (we won 3-2)? Well then, that has to be the second-minute Reducer I put on the Russian Press left-winger while representing England Press in Moscow. It is for others to judge whether it set the positive tone for our first half. But when I was taken off after 65 minutes we were only 2-1 down in a game we lost 7-2.

Most memorable match covered?
It has to be an Arsenal game, for obvious reasons. And it was probably Real Madrid 0 Arsenal 1 at the Bernabéu in February 2006. They went into the game 25 points off Chelsea’s lead and four points off Tottenham Hotspur in fourth place. And even when they had dominated the English game, that great Arsenal team had been extremely inconsistent in Europe. The expectations were very, very low as Arsenal took on a team who three seasons before had won the European Cup for the ninth time, but they absolutely dominated Madrid. I remember after the final whistle and exchanging conspiratorial my-God-did-that-really-just-happen glances with Crossie. It felt like something special, and it was – Arsenal were en route to a first ever European Cup final.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Sorry but it’s Arsenal again. I’d take those few minutes of that game at Anfield in 1989 between the moment when a snarling Steve McMahon goes around the Liverpool team cajoling them with his index finger and saying: “One minute left” to when Michael Thomas gives Grobelaar the nuts and Arsenal the title. The greatest dénouement of any season ever.

Best stadium?
Camp Nou with Celtic in it. I still have the tinnitus to show for the atmosphere.

…and the worst?
The much-lamented Layer Road, where I used to stand to watch Colchester United on a Friday night. Like so many football supporters in the 1980s I was unwittingly risking my life in a wooden stand among the crisp packets, polystyrene cups and discarded fag-ends beneath. God rest those poor souls at Bradford City.

Your best ever scoop?
My best-ever journalism was not a single story but the series of exclusives I did on the so-called billionaire Middle Eastern consortium at Notts County led by Russell King. I was on to this conman straight away and my work forced him and his cronies out of the club, preventing them from taking over BMW Sauber’s F1 franchise and from launching a dubious stockmarket float of a “mining company” that could have cost investors millions on the way. It was not the sort of stuff I expected to be uncovering when I set out in football reporting but it was thrilling to know I had achieved something meaningful. Even though it was a rocky road with a lot of the Notts fans at times.

Your personal new-tech disaster?
I like to think I’m New School enough to get the technology to work but I confess to having got annoyed when the Wifi and dongle connections have both dropped out shortly before the second-half runner is due over.

Biggest mistake?
Trusting someone who said he’d seen a famous unmarried sportsman booted out of the Wimbledon press box while canoodling with his latest squeeze. His tip became the basis of a 50-word diary-payoff item that the local bugle where he was from ripped off. He sued us for a few thousands. It was probably true but there were no pictures to demonstrate it, no way of tracking the stewards who ejected him and so I couldn’t prove it. I was young and impressionable.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
Lots of people. Funny question.

Most media friendly manager?
In my experience, Mark McGhee at Millwall. He was always great in press conferences after matches and I later bumped into him in Brighton when he was managing there and in Edinburgh when he was at Motherwell. He was always an absolute gent.

Best ever player?
Lionel Messi. Already.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
I loved that 1982 Italy side and used to play at being Paolo Rossi in the garden. The Milan team that won the European Cup in 1989 and 1990 with Rijkaard, Gullit and Van Basten would have taken some beating in any era.

Best pre-match grub?
Oh dear. Arsenal.

Best meal had on your travels?
When we went to see Alisher Usmanov in Moscow at the Kempinsky he certainly lavished us with a meal I wouldn’t have got through on exes.

…and the worst?
Nothing that really sticks in the mind. Can’t say I’ve ever really experienced any upsets.

Best hotel stayed in?
The city-centre apartment-hotel in Vienna for Euro 2008. I was able to take my wife and my eldest, who was then one, while working out there. A rare treat to be travelling and not having to leave the family at home.

…and the worst?
The Soviet-era block in Minsk when I went there with Scotland. Not a place I’d return to in a hurry.

Favourite football writer?
Sammy. I don’t always agree with him (in fact I once found something he wrote downright offensive) but it’s always well researched and well argued.

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
Martin Tyler. Stood the test of time.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
I’d personally take a sledgehammer to all the fences around football-club training grounds and let us mingle with the players again. We, like them, are human beings.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
Watching England at the MCG in the Boxing Day Test with my best man who’s emigrated out there.

Last book read?
Treasure Islands: Tax Havens and the Men who Stole the World by Nicholas Shaxson. Breathtaking.

Favourite current TV programme?
Boardwalk Empire.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
The t-shirt and jetsam from the streamer-machines from the last-ever match at Highbury. How could I possibly end with anything else?

FWA Q&A: Bob Harris

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We talk to The Sun’s Bob Harris about East German food, Swiss ringers and, er, In the Night Garden.

First ever newspaper?
The now defunct Birmingham Planet

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
Cricket beckoned until serious injury which also cost me my “other” job which was basically playing cricket for a company once a week with the title of assistant progress manager.

What was your finest achievement playing football?
Keeping the score down to under 10 while playing in goal for the press against a team of Swiss ringers who were better than our ringers – by a long way!

Most memorable match covered?
1966 World Cup Final.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Gordon Banks’ save against Pele in Mexico 70.

Best stadium?
The old Maracana in Rio before it started to fall down because of lack of investment.

…and the worst?
Heysel Stadium, Brussels May 29, 1985.

Your best ever scoop?
Still waiting!

Your personal new-tech disaster?
Far too many to mention – still prefer biro and notepad.

Biggest mistake?
Wiping out a huge feature (did I ever write short ones?) on the old Tandy by pressing the wrong button as the family waited for me to take them to Sunday lunch.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
Eric Morecambe (while he was still alive I hasten to add).

Most media friendly manager?
Who else? The late Sir Bobby Robson.

Best ever player?
Pele, John Charles, Duncan Edwards and, of course, Messi.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
Liverpool (76-81); Real Madrid (1955-60); Man Utd Treble winners (1999); Birmingham City (1956); Brazil (1970 and other dates).

Best pre-match grub?
Not too much choice outside the Barclays Premier League.

Best meal had on your travels?
Doyle’s at Watson Bay in Sydney.

…and the worst?
East Germany (various).

Best hotel stayed in?
The Kempinski, Bodrum and a large selection of five stars in Mauritius including the latest addition Long Beach.

…and the worst?
Any number in the old Eastern Europe.

Favourite football writer?
David Lacey (Guardian).

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
Mike Ingham and the late Peter Jones.

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
Far, far too late, perhaps the Tardis to take us back to pre Premier League wages days.

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
My 10th Olympic Games in London next year (fingers crossed).

Last book read?
The Prometheus Deception by Robert Ludlum.

Favourite current TV programme?
In The Night Garden.

Your most prized football memorabilia?
Signed picture of Bobby Robson and John Charles in action in an England v Wales international.

Bob Harris covers matches for the Sun

FWA Q&A: Warren Haughton

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We talk to talkSPORT producer Warren Haughton about the 1999 Champions League final, spare batteries and scoring in the FA Cup.

Your first ever newspaper?
The first ever newspapers I wrote for were The Sun and Daily Star when I was working for Hayters on a work experience basis.

Have you ever worked in a profession other than journalism?
I used to be a professional footballer with Leicester City and played a good standard of non-league for Woking, Tamworth and Havant & Waterloovile

What was your finest achievement playing football?
Scoring FA Cup 1st round goals for Tamworth and Havant & Waterlooville or playing for Woking in the Conference, something I didn’t think would happen.

Most memorable match covered?
Dagenham were the first team I covered for a season and it was a pleasure to see them beat Aldershot 2-1 at home to clinch promotion to the Football League back in 2007.

The one moment in football you would put on a DVD?
Solksjaer’s winner against Bayern Munich in Champions League Final in 1999

Best stadium?
For work The Emirates is great.

…and the worst?
Rothwell Town

Your best ever scoop?
So far it’s Gervinho to Lille and PSG’s Taraabt bid last summer

Your personal new-tech disaster?
Assuming Griffin Park, Brentford, had Wifi when I covered my first ever Football League game

Biggest mistake?
Not having spare batteries for Luton Town post-match managers’ press conference and having to run out of stadium to local shop.

Have you ever been mistaken for anyone else?
Some would say I’ve been mixed up with someone who actually played football.

Most media friendly manager?
Apart from Harry Redknapp it has to be Martin Allen, now Notts County

Best ever player?
Maradona but Messi is not far behind.

Best ever teams (club and international)?
Barcelona 2011 and loved the Brazil 1982 World Cup team

Best pre-match grub?
The Emirates

Best meal had on your travels?
The Emirates

…and the worst?
Spurs is the worst of a good bunch

Favourite football writer?
I’m a big Observer fan so I’ll go for Paul Wilson

Favourite radio/TV commentator?
Radio: talkSPORT’s Sam Matterface and Stan Collymore; TV: Martin Tyler

If you could introduce one change to improve PR between football clubs and football writers what would it be?
I don’t think you can introduce any hard or fast rules, just a softening of the approach to each other from both sides

One sporting event outside football you would love to experience?
London 2012 Olympics 100m final

Last book read?
Football – Bloody Hell by Patrick Barclay

Favourite current TV programme?
Dexter

Your most prized football memorabilia?
A Bronze predator boot presented to me by Kenny Dalglish in 2000 for being one half of the best strike force in non-league football that season.